Momma Taught Me How to Live Life and Lead Joyfully

My Momma was a beautiful person…inside and out. In most of the pictures of her, she is wearing a smile. In life, she taught my siblings and me how to smile, how to laugh (even when things weren’t going our way) and definitely how to have a sense of humor. She modeled that one well! She also taught us how to enjoy the little things. She would repeatedly say that to me, “Gail, it’s the little things in life…not the big things.” And I’m pretty sure I repeat that saying often. 😊

Unconditional Love of Family

Mom’s story is all about the unconditional love of family. Thank goodness there are many pictures of Mom and Dad. She and Dad modeled a lifetime of deep love for one another. She treated him like a king, and he treated her like a queen. Mom was married to her soul mate, the love of her life, her high school sweetheart (my Dad) just two days shy of 64 years.

Mom’s unconditional love was extended to her pride and joy…her four kids…and then, of course, the grandkids and great-grandkids. I’d like at this time to apologize to those of you that endured the probable repeat stories of our exploits. (It was a Mom’s bragging rights!) 😊

Life with Mom was FUN!

My brother Gregory and I are 13 months apart. There are seven years between my sister Nancy and me… and my youngest sister Anna and I are 13 years apart. Mom always said that she helped make Valentine boxes and packed school lunches for almost 30 years! Bless her heart. 🙂 Being raised in a different decade from Nancy and Anna, Gregory and my childhood looked a tad different. Mom taught me how to iron and the first items were my Dad’s handkerchiefs. She taught me how to do cross-stitch, how to sew, how to knit, cook, and clean. She was a great cook by the way, and she especially loved to bake! She is famous for her rolls…and her cherry cheesecake is now being requested for birthdays by the great-grandkids!

I was one of those crazy moms who looked forward to being with my kids during the summer. I attribute that to our Mom. She made growing up FUN. For instance, she had a day designated for cleaning. I don’t know too many kids that love to clean, but my Mom made it entertaining! She wrote chores on long strips of paper, folded them up, and put them in a bowl. She would make Gregory and I close our eyes and select a slip of paper. When you completed a chore, you came back to draw again until the slips of paper disappeared.

It was Mom’s attitude, too. She acted all excited like doing chores was the best thing since sliced bread. (That’s a mom saying for sure!) I can just hear her asking in that sing-song sort of voice, “Guess what daaaaay it is?”. She was smart enough to tap into my brother and my competitive natures, too. Hence, the game “chores” became one to win in our minds by becoming the first to finish. Yep, we weren’t the sharpest crayons in the box! Or…at least by the time we caught on, chores were just a part of our routine.

Like I said, Mom made growing up fun. Other kids loved coming to our house to hang out. One of us (I can’t remember who) told Gregory’s friend that if he went up and scared Mom, she would chase him. So, he scares her, she lets out a yelp, and the race ensued. They ran all around the house and then he thought he’d “one-up” her by running outside. In his mind, no mother would EVER run outside. (Remember the era?). He runs out the door and stops. The door flies open and here comes Mom in hot pursuit. You should have seen the look on his face! Yes, Mom made childhood fun.

Momma was always there, too. She showed up at all my volleyball games, my softball games, when I birthed my babies, and every event that I can think of in my life! At every occasion, big or small Momma was there.

The End of the Road

My siblings and I (plus the grandkids, and one great-grand) are so thankful we got to spend time with Mom (and with each other!) during the last month of Mom’s life. I’m especially grateful to our sister Anna for being there with Dad when Mom took her last breath.

Dementia is a horrible disease that took many things from Mom. But what it didn’t take was her ability to love and tell us how much she loved us. As Anna wrote on her Facebook page, “I lost count of how many times Mom said, “I love you…mucho, mucho” to her family over the last few weeks. At one point, I started sending her air smooches across the room, and she’d air smooch me back. That paid off when she got tired and talked a little bit less because she was rarely too tired for a nice air smooch.” 😊

Our Momma didn’t lose her smile either. Dad would say, “You better stop smiling at me or I’m going to have to kiss you.” Of course, that made her smile all the bigger. 😊

There are many other stories and attributes of Mom I could share, however, there isn’t room enough to contain them all. I do want to conclude by sharing about that last 5K that Mom and I entered.

It was the summer of 2010 and Mom and Dad had driven from their home in TX to ours (which is a little over 200 miles) the night before the race. Mom hadn’t consumed much water because she didn’t want to stop while driving. The next morning the skies were filled with dark rain clouds. (They will not typically cancel a race unless there is lightning.) We got dressed and headed out early.

The race gun sounded, and we took off. I was jogging and Momma was fast walking. 3.2 miles wasn’t anything for Momma as she had walked the walking trails in their home town frequently. Halfway through the race, the skies opened, and a torrential downpour ensued! I crossed the finish line soaked and checked in with Dad (our cheerleader). Then we waited and waited. Runners were coming in…and then there were none….and… no Mom. We both started to worry, so I ran back to find her.

When Momma finally came into my sight, she had an entourage of police officers on bicycles and one in a golf cart trying to persuade her to get in! We now know that she was dehydrated and was really struggling. She said, “Gail, tell them I’m not getting in that thing!” I’m pretty sure she didn’t want to be rude to them, so I was supposed to tell them. Ha! I took one look at her face and recognized the family hard-headedness…errr…I mean determination! Arm and arm, we walked until we got close to the finish line which she walked across on her own two feet.

This race was the epitome of who my Momma was…a woman full of grit and determination that carried her through the ups and downs of life.

By the way, she received a medal because she was one of very few in her age division. She was 74 years old at the time. Momma’s always been my “she’ro”!

Our Mom came into this world and entered the ultimate race on February 16^th, 1936.

She fought the good fight. She lived and loved hard for 83 years.

She finished her race on June 23, 2019.

I love you, Momma…mucho, mucho!!

Gail